Comedy Flashback Week 2009 - “The #1 Internet comedy festival on the Internet” - is once again underway, and I’m proud to kick off this week’s festivities. This is a festival to celebrate old and/or no longer relevant comedy. In that spirit here are some jokes that didn’t make it into a sketch/variety show I worked on in Fall 2008.

- Eddie Brawley

“Old Jokes”

On the 2008 Olympics:
The Beijing Catering Trade Association has told more than 100 designated Olympic restaurants to remove dog from their menus in an effort not to offend foreign tourists. So diners will no longer be able to taste dog meat intentionally.

On Madonna’s Divorce:
Madonna divorced her husband Guy Richie this week to be with Yankee Alex Rodriguez, confirming the stereotype that elderly Jewish women love gay men.

On A Rumored Jackson 5 Reunion:
Jermaine Jackson said this week that the Jackson 5, including Janet and Michael, would be reuniting for a series of concerts. To be fair, that’s his excuse whenever he needs the night off at Applebee’s.

On Somalian Pirates:
Somalian Pirates are on track to make a record $50 million dollars in profit in 2008. That much money will go a long way, especially when your living expenses are less than a dollar a day.

On Sarah Palin:
It was reported this week that Sarah Palin was unaware that Africa was a continent. When corrected, Palin replied, “No, I know the three continents: coffee, yogurt, and your choice of bagel or donut.”

*Festival Performer